Vikings forfeit playoff spot due to having crappy fans

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NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has decided it would be “in the best interests of the NFL” to have the Packers host Philadelphia instead of Minnesota. As word spreads about the chance that the scheduled playoff game this weekend pitting Minnesota against Philadelphia may not sell out, because 45% of Vikings season ticket holders have not purchased their tickets yet, Goodell determined action needed to be taken.

“The Vikings have earned their playoff berth technically by winning the most games in the NFC North. But I’d be lying if I said the NFL was excited to see the Vikings make it instead of the Packers. The Packers have much better fans. In fact, the Packers sell out pre-season games, not to mention regular season games and of course, they’d sell out a playoff game before the tickets even went on sale. In any event, the NFL has decided that it would be in the best interests of the NFL to have the Packers host Philadelphia instead this weekend. We believe it would be a better game and bring more money to our pockets ultimately, which is really all we’re after”.

(Goodell also reportedly muttered under his breath after making this decision that not allowing Minnesota to play would spare viewers from having to see Jared Allen’s unbelievably bad mullet).

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10 Responses to “Vikings forfeit playoff spot due to having crappy fans”

  1. Andy Hoffman Says:

    I bet Jared Allen is drunk right now.

  2. Jim Says:

    What do you expect from a state where half the voters would think that Al Franken is worthy of their vote for Senator. I hope the Vikings are humiliated.

  3. Cindy V Says:

    So would that make Lambeau Field, home field for the Viqueens? At least Randy Moss isn’t still with the team!

  4. bucky Says:

    What do you expect from a state where half the voters would think that Al Franken is worthy of their vote for Senator.

    Punctuation aside, I think you meant to say “a state where slighty more than half the voters would think that Al Franken is worthy of their vote for Senator.”

  5. PackerBelle Says:

    “What do you expect from a state where half the voters would think that Al Franken is worthy of their vote for Senator. ”

    When the alternative is Norm Coleman, I’d say the state has sense.

    And yes, I live in MN.

  6. awhayes Says:

    Is that THE Andy Hoffman? Welcome sir…

    Packerbelle – my in-laws faced that same dilemma living in MN. Both those guys are tools!

  7. PackerBelle Says:

    Franken certainly wasn’t my first choice but in my opinion pretty much anyone is better than Coleman. He follows wherever the wind blows which means he is even less trustworthy than the average politician. Franken has his own issues but he’s shown himself to be intelligent and I agree with most of his positions.

  8. Cindy V Says:

    This is almost as funny as the Onion piece about how the Packers gave Favre to a nice farm family. Read it here: http://www.theonion.com/content/news/packers_tell_fans_they_gave_favre?utm_source=onion_rss_daily

  9. PackerBelle Says:

    And the Viking still haven’t sold all the tickets. What does that say about your fanbase when you can’t sell out a home playoff game?

  10. Jim Says:

    I heard the Vikings hired the Minnesota Democrats and promptly “found” some more points in the trunk of a referee’s car. Vikings win 27 to 26!

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